The Bind: The biggest thing that stops most people from going after (and therefore getting) what they really want in life is Fear.
What is Fear and where does it come from?
Fear is simply an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is a threat, dangerous or will cause pain. Fear is both physical and emotional. Fear is experienced in your mind, but it triggers a strong physical reaction in your body. Fear arises with the threat of harm, either physical, emotional, or psychological, real or imagined. While traditionally considered a “negative” emotion, fear actually serves an important role in keeping us safe as it mobilizes us to cope with potential danger.
The ultimate purpose of fear is to protect us. The fundamental, deeply wired portion of fear results in the fight, flight, or freeze phenomenon that we are all familiar with. The primal brain wants everything to stay the same – because if everything stays the same we won’t die.
When you set a goal here’s what’s going to happen – every reason why it’s not possible, it won’t work, how you’re not qualified, and how you’re gonna let yourself down start playing in your head.
Here’s the truth about fear – Will Smith sums it up nicely: “Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. Do not misunderstand me, danger is very real, but fear is a choice.”
The Fournier Formula: Reframe Fear
“Fears are nothing more than states of mind. One’s state of mind is subject to control and direction.” -Napoleon Hill
So, since you are ultimately in charge and control of the direction of your state of mind…. Take charge already!
So when ‘fear’ comes up:
1) Quickly identify – am I in danger? Are you being chased by a saber toothed tiger? If so, call 911 and RUN!!!! If not, go to step #2.
2) Pause. Breathe. Literally breathe normally in through your nose and out through your mouth as if through a straw until you are in a place of calm. This helps stimulate the other side of your nervous system – rest, digest, and create. As you do this, you breathe – into yourself, into the current moment, into the Divine intersection between your human self and your Infinite Self where Infinite Resources and creative solutions are available.
3) Partner with the fear. Success and greatness include fear. Remember fear is only a feeling. So the worst thing that will happen is a feeling! (Tune into my next Newsletter about Emotions and Feelings). Buckle the fear in the back seat of your mind.
4) Fear is simply feedback. It’s letting you know you’re at the edge of something different and unfamiliar. And everything you want is outside of your familiar zone, isn’t it? So that’s great news! You’re on the edge of something great. Fear doesn’t mean we can’t, it simply means we haven’t yet.
5) Take 1 step. Step outside your familiar zone – that’s where all possibility lives! That’s where the magic happens. Let’s face it – the Boogey man also lives in the unknown. And he’s made up too! So if you’re going to make something up – make up something good! And take any step in the direction of your dream.
6) Repeat as often as necessary.
There is a difference between having fear and fear having you. You choose! Giddy up! Your dreams are waiting. You got this!