Simple and Lasting

by | Jul 23, 2021 | 0 comments

The Bind: Change is hard! Ever heard yourself say that? Yet we long for change in our life – whether it is in our health, our relationships, our career or our time and money freedom. And we’ll even decide, “This is it, I’m going to change (insert your area here) starting today.”

And then nothing changes. In fact, sometimes it seems like we are doing more of what we said we were not going to do anymore! How can that be? Well, here you go: Change becomes difficult because we focus on the negative aspects of the change. (BTW, this is true for everything we label ‘hard’ or ‘difficult’). 


Here are 3 reasons why ‘nothing changes’:        

1- We are creatures of habit. We are programmed to follow our unconscious patterns in life. And the ironic part of this is that we are the programmers of those patterns! These unconscious patterns started out as a conscious practice. And then we practiced over and over until it became unconscious and automatic. And we are not even aware that we are repeating the patterns. A simple analogy is tying our shoes or driving. Don’t get me wrong, there is a lot of efficiency and purpose for many of our unconscious habits. And one of the jobs of our unconscious mind is to take the path of least resistance – much like a trail horse will doggedly (pun intended) continue to go back to the trail. So we do what we perceive to be easy.

2- What you think about, you bring about. Everything is energy. We are energy. Where our attention goes, energy flows. What we think about generates a vibration, frequency, or feeling tone. That feeling tone or vibration attracts like to it. We want to stop habits or patterns and then we focus on what we don’t want.  If you constantly think about your debt you will create more debt. When you focus on what is wrong in your relationship, it amplifies. Your mind likes to be efficient, so once it has been thinking the same thoughts in the same patterns over and over again, it requires practice and skill to change. If you want to change your thought patterns, you will have to practice patience. Otherwise, you are in a battle with your own mind, and when it’s you against your same old ways, you will always lose. Conversely, when you think about love or generating wealth, you will create more love and wealth. Ask yourself this question: what was the last opportunity you were presented with? And when you think about that – did you visualize (think) yourself succeeding or the reasons why it wouldn’t work?
3- We love, love, love the familiar zone! We want change, though we don’t want to change. Many people call this the Comfort Zone. I have worked with thousands of clients and have yet to find one who is actually comfortable! Hence, their reason for hiring a Master Life Coach. Many people experience pain and discontent in their Comfort Zone. SO why do we stay there? Because it is familiar! We know what this looks like. We fear the unknown. And yet everything we desire or long for is outside this Familiar Zone. Sure the boogie man lives in the unknown, though so do our dreams and all possibility! So we stay in the familiar and don’t risk the unknown, unless we have a plan for the unknown.   
“We want to achieve our goals because then everything would be different. We also don’t want to achieve our goals because then everything would be different.” (John Ryan)  

The Fournier Formula:

To create lasting transformational change is actually a simple process. (Though what is simple to do is also simple not to do.)

Everything starts with a decision! So make a decision that you are going to change in an area of your life. Notice I said ‘in’. Nothing changes in our lives until we change and that begins with changing our thinking. Yikes – that means I am responsible! 
Step 1: Release and repattern negative emotions and limiting beliefs. All limiting beliefs are preceded by a decision. The decision is usually unconscious and was made when we were very young based on how we think the world works and our place in the world. The most effective and efficient way I know to do this is through Mental and Emotional Release® techniques at the unconscious level, in which I am trained as a Master Practitioner. Regardless, you first have to bring to awareness those patterns that are not in alignment with what you want. These are patterns that you have practiced over and over until they become automatic. Be informed by your past not anchored to it. Once you are aware and have released the pattern, then you need to replace those old patterns with new practices. And as the word implies, practice, practice, practice until they become automatic as well. You do have practices of success in your life too, don’t you??!!
Step 2: Create a compelling future. Create a vision of a life you would love to live, a life that lights you up and makes your heart sing! What would actually get you up in the morning and excited about your day? Whether it’s a 90 day goal or a 5 year vision – keep asking yourself “what would I love??”. Most people spend more time planning a wedding or a vacation then they ever do a blueprint for a life they would love. Not only do you deserve to live happy, you are divinely designed to live in alignment with your gifts and dreams. It doesn’t matter where you came from. The better question is, where are you going? 
Step 3: Take action. Bust a move! Any move. Nothing in your life will move until you move! And for those of you who are perfectionists or need a perfect plan before you take a step – take a step anyway. (Register now for Piss Off Perfect!) or need a perfect plan before you take a step. We get so bogged down in the ‘how’??!!  Here’s a how: how in the heck do you expect to have a perfect plan to go somewhere you have never gone before??!! Let go of the how. The How already knows how! Start where you are with what you have. Meet yourself there. Take one step. Then another. Keep repeating. An object in motion stays in motion. You will attract the connections and resources you need as you move. Trust. 

Step 4: Stay focused on what you want. Period. What would you love? Focus on that. Repeat as often as necessary! This is a daily practice, one and done! Commit to what you would love! Commitment and focus are free renewable resources! You already have everything need in this moment.

Ready to get out of this bind? Want help creating a vision for 
life that makes your heart sing?


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